Kaden and the bullies

So, I really need to blog this morning about Kaden and his experience at scouts the last three weeks. I thought that these boys that go to church, school, and scouts with him were good kids, but I was totally wrong! Even the newest member of scouts was really awful to my son!
It's a life long story, and unfortunately the results of bullying are becoming more and more severe as time goes on. Things are different now than when I was getting bullied as a kid, and I'm afraid that the repercussions are getting more violent as well.
Kaden's leader called me during scouts and told me that she didn't know what else to do to help him. She said that the kids were outside teasing him about his bike while we spoke. She then said that she had to go because he was coming in crying to her and she had to deal with it. My car couldn't drive fast enough to get the three blocks to her house.
As I got there, one of his "friends" were finally giving up for the day, and I stopped to ask him who was bullying Kaden, and he proceeded to say, "everyone but me". I reminded him ever so bluntly that I had just got off the phone with his leader and she said that he was one of the worst instigators of them all. He then said "oh yeah, rriiighttt"!!! That just threw me into a tizzy!! I wanted to get even with all the bullies that used to tease me at that age, but being in the Primary Presidency, I refrained from kicking him in the mouth, and I simply said, "how do you think that your mom would feel about Kaden if you went home and said that he was picking on you?" He said,"bad". Then I said "o.k., next time you even think about picking on MY SON, I think you need to think about how his mom would feel to hear this!"
I sent him on his way unharmed (for now) and went into the leaders house to find a shriveled up shell of my son, crying hysterically. Not about being teased, but about being so different! He made the comment that he just wanted to stand in the middle of the road and wait for a car to "just run him over" so that this would stop.
Now, being teased myself at that age, quite harshly I might add, how do I deal with his feelings, when I haven't dealt with mine yet. It breaks my heart that you can no longer wear your heart on your sleeve, but instead you have to have it so protected and "numb" that horrible things are thought, or worse, acted upon.
I can't help to think of the story of the little boy that was walking home with what looked like the entire contents of his locker. There were 3 or 4 boys around him, teasing him so harshly. Another boy that just moved in around the corner just happened to come upon this little session and stepped up to help this boy in need. He helped him home and then invited him to go and hang out at the park with him and a couple of friends. He reluctantly agreed, not knowing what to expect. He had a great time, and a great long lasting friendship.
Time went on, and the two boys became very good friends. They went to college and were about to graduate. The boy that was being picked on had developed into a fine looking young man. He was valedictorian and at the top of the class. While he was giving his speech, he talked only about this hero of a friend that literally saved his life and continued to read from his journal.
"I cleaned out my locker today. I can't handle getting teased any more. I am going to kill myself today, and I don't want my mom to have to go to the school and clean out my locker herself."
With that, he thanked his friend again for saving his life, and sat down.
I can't shake the fact that this story is a possibility for my son. I don't know what to do for him. I just hope that he gets a good friend like I finally did in fifth grade. Tami had my back and she let me know that I was her friend no matter what anybody else thought of me. I am now, more than ever, so grateful for her friendship throughout the rest of my childhood. Thanks for letting me stand on your shoulders when I was drowning. I am also grateful for coming from such a strong family that supported me and gave me a safe nest to unravel in every day.
So, back to the story of Kaden. I wanted so badly to get even with all of these boys that were teasing my heart, and so when I got home, I turned to the Prophet, President Hinckley. I started thumbing through the Ensign, and it just fell open on President Hinckley's conference address called "Slow to Anger". In the talk he quotes,"It is when we become angry that we get into trouble." "I dare say that most of the inmates of our prisons are there because they did something when they were angry. In their wrath they swore, they lost control of themselves, and terrible things followed, even murder. There were moments of offense followed by years of regret." In his closing he said,"Now, my dear brethren, in closing I plead with you to control your tempers, to put a smile upon your faces, which will erase anger;" "May the Lord bless you and inspire you to walk without anger, without bitterness of any kind, but to reach out to others with expressions of friendship, appreciation, and love."
He spoke to me from Heaven. We are to follow the Saviors example while on this earth. At what point in his life did he retaliate when the "bullies" wouldn't lay off. He didn't even retaliate while hanging on the cross. In his final moments he said, "forgive THEM, for they know not what they do."
So, the lesson that I have learned from all of this, is forgive them. Forgive all the bullies on this earth, and teach my kids how to react peacefully when they start to bully them again. It may be harder than it sounds, but What Would Jesus Do?